It's Official... I'm Certifiable.

I am unable to walk away from anything in distress. While walking in the forest with Bailey I noticed something very white in the path. I almost stepped on it. It turned out to be a beautiful white furry moth. It looked dead, but I didn't want to just leave it there to be smushed, so I picked it up and I was going to look at it and then place it off the path. Only when I picked it up, a couple of it's little legs twitched! We had some really bad wind and rain that day so I thought maybe it was cold or stunned from hitting something. So I put it in my hand and carried it and warmed it up. After 10 minutes or so, it woke up and started crawling around. So I found a nice bush and put it up out of harms way. I stopped by to check on him the next day and he was still alive and the next day he was gone. I hope he flew off to live a nice life. At least that is what I prefer to think.

Goodbye Forever Ambien!

I was so scared to do it. I love sleep and not getting it is a horrible experience for me. Ambien has always given me a guarantee that when I go to bed, that I will actually sleep.

Well, a week and a half ago I had a horrible experience with it. I did something unsafe on it and didn't realize it until morning. I knew it was time to get off it. I was just as addicted to it as I have ever been to any drug in my life.

So I stopped. A week and a half ago I stopped taking it cold turkey. AND I'M DOING GREAT! Sure the first few days were hard. I only got two hours of sleep the first night and only six the second night, but I have been sleeping full nights ever since. Of course it helps that I am working from home and can tweak my morning a bit now and then, but it still feels so good. It was so much easier then I thought it would be! I can't believe I was so scared of living without it.

I will never take it again. Not ever. I threw away all the rest of the pills and the prescriptions.

Next on my list... cigarettes. I have been smoking way too much lately and my lungs hurt in the morning. I can feel how hard it is for me to catch my breath when I walk with bailey. And it stinks! I may have to give up alcohol for a while since that is what triggers me the most. If the only time I ever smoke is when I am hanging with Kelly, that would be fine since I only see her once or twice a month now.

I am seriously considering taking dance lessons. I do love to dance and it is great exercise.

I'm loving all the babies in my life right now. Riley and Killian are so amazing to watch grow up. I can't wait to see my niece in December.

And Bailey is still making me happy as can be... as usual.